The OCD of Picking a Book

It’s only natural my “attention to detail”, as I like to call it, has passed onto one of my greatest loves: books.

From an early age my parents have told me I’m an extremely picky eater – food could never be too sweet or too salty. Then there’s my problem with buying clothes. I always check that there’s no loose stitching. Buying knitwear is a nightmare because if the wool has been “hooked” out of the knitting I can’t buy it. Also, I have to check that pants are sewn straight!

Assuming ceteris paribus (all other things being equal) – that is, the rating on Goodreads, the reviews people give, the amount of knowledge I have about the book – this is what drives me to pick a book from the shelf:

The Cover

Whoever said don’t judge a book by its cover is so wrong, I’m sorry.

A Review of Every YA (Contemporary) Book I’ve Ever Read

Wow.  Double Ue. Owh.  Double Ue.  Owh Em Gee, Guys.

Don’t you just love it how every contemporary novel these days is so dayum different?  Today’s review is of Every Young Adult (Contemporary) I have Ever Read – clearly my favourite so far!

This book was an amazing examination of bullying/slut shaming/dark romance.  All the feels I was given by this insanely original premise set the wings of my heart alight and made me soar through the sky of life lessons that I will probably soon forget.

The main character was so sassy/reminds me of myself as a teen/too stupid to live, whilst being damaged and complex.  Her life story and what she suffers through is just really sad though.  This book is about how she manages to find herself/deal with her past/grow as a person whilst gaining the love of her (short) life. 

Brief disclaimer: If you know of one of these books, that has already been written, you are legally obligated to inform me of them!

Concept #1

A Sad Clown realizes s/he has a supernatural ability to make people smile – Ends the Great Depression with laughter.

Possible Title: The Great Depression

Synopsis: Celia finds life morbid and strange, and always has.  She wants to make people think about their lives, but strangely she can only make them laugh.  The Great Depression is in full swing, and at a time where Celia wants to make people think, they want only to be entertained.  Finally, giving up, she decides to do both because, hey, people be cray-cray, right? So fart jokes it is.  All the fart jokes they can take until the Great Depression ends due to an over abundance of laughter.

But did Celia make them think enough… about farts?

Image by Bitter Sweet Venom

Concept #2

A sci-fi world where nobody can remember the protagonist unless s/he wrongs them in some way.

1. Read books even though everyone else is getting ARCs from BEA

2. Rearrange your sock draw.  Fucking socks getting all unorganized.

3. Is that some lint?

4. Schedule enough blogposts for a whole month!

5. Half of them suck so… delete.

6. Have fun because BEA is probably so boring.

7. But that’s hard because you’re all by yourself.  Bet those people at BEA aren’t alone…

8. Wikipedia chain link reading until life doesn’t hurt so bad.

9. Drink.

10. Drink some more.

11. Where did all the drinks go?!

12. More lint?  Time to burn everything!

13. Hatereview a terrible book.

14. Feel bad.  No author deserves that kind of hatred.

15. Post it anyway.  THE WORLD MUST BURN!

16. Is it too late to go anyway?

17. Yes.

18. Where is all this lint coming from?! Goddamn it!

19. Ice cream.  Lots of it.

20. Reality TV.  My only hope.

Welcome to In 10 Lines. Ever wanted to know what happens in a book, but couldn’t be assed reading it for yourself? Cuddlebuggery comes to the rescue with In 10 Lines. In 10 Lines we will tell you everything you need to know about the featured book so that you can cheerfully move on with your life, or choose to read it should your attention be piqued. So sit back, relax, and try not to clench as we proceed.

Today we’ll be reworking Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo, one of Steph’s favourite and an amazing series. Fun, sexy, flirty and dangerous – this series generally causes people to rave generously in the direction of either Mal or Darling with incessant passion. So without further adieu, we present to you: Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo in 10 Lines!

Mal: Hey Alina, it’s been a tough childhood as two orphan bestfriends, But I just want you to know that even though I am super popular, everyone loves me, and you’re a mangy loner, I still care about you.