The Author Commandments

1 February, 2014 Musing Musers, Random 22 comments

family-guy-obey-meBlogging is a lot of work. It’s a simply fact I’m sure we all can moderately agree on. All the time put into formatting, scheduling, promoting, writing, reading can be a little exhausting. As such, it’s not completely unreasonable for us here at Cuddlebuggery to ask authors who wish us to review their book to give a little something in return. Sure, you might be feel that your time is better spent, I don’t know, writing, but it’s literally the least you can do.  If you are an author and had no idea these Author Commandments existed, then rest assured all will be forgiven if you complete these steps within 48 hours. Real life be damned.

1. Buy me chocolate.

2. Jump up and down while patting your stomach and rubbing your head. Or is it patting your head and rubbing your stomach? Oh well, AMUSE ME.

3. Fart the alphabet.

4. Now do it backwards.

5. Wash my car. You missed a spot.

6. Drive me to the toy store. No, the other toy store.

7. Call me Darth Vader.

I'm your father

8. Dance off! You just got served.

9. Read me bedtime stories. With voices.

10. Travel to the ends of the earth and bring back The One Ring to rule them all. My precioussssss.

What’s that you say? You have a deadline to meet for that manuscript you’ve been working on and have no time or inclination to fulfill my ridiculous, frivolous and self-indulgent requests?! Well then I don’t want to review your book! I hope you step on a lego! So there! Neener, neener!

/sarcasm 

Carry on, everyone.

Steph Sinclair

Steph Sinclair

Co-blogger at Cuddlebuggery
I'm a bibliophile trying to make it through my never-ending To-Be-Read list, equal opportunity snarker and fangirl, YA Books Central editor and co-blogger here at Cuddlebuggery. Find me on GoodReads.
Steph Sinclair
Review: Liesl & Po by Lauren Oliver http://t.co/TRxLeVpRAX #CuddlebuggeryArchive - 2 hours ago
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22 Responses to “The Author Commandments”

  1. smiling_ina
    Twitter:

    You totally just made my day with this!!! Haha I love the “I hope you step on a Lego.” part! Man, stepping on one of those motherfu**ers hurts like a son of bitch! Thanks for this!!! :D

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