Welcome to In 10 Lines. Ever wanted to know what happens in a book, but couldn’t be assed reading it for yourself? Cuddlebuggery comes to the rescue with In 10 Lines. In 10 Lines we will tell you everything you need to know about the featured book so that you can cheerfully move on with your life, or choose to read it should your attention be piqued. So sit back, relax, and try not to clench as we proceed.
Today we’ll be reworking Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo, one of Steph’s favourite and an amazing series. Fun, sexy, flirty and dangerous – this series generally causes people to rave generously in the direction of either Mal or Darling with incessant passion. So without further adieu, we present to you: Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo in 10 Lines!
Mal: Hey Alina, it’s been a tough childhood as two orphan bestfriends, But I just want you to know that even though I am super popular, everyone loves me, and you’re a mangy loner, I still care about you. As friends.
Alina: Aw! Thanks, Mal! But turns out that I’m a badass sun summoner from legend! So I’m off to change the world with this super hawt guy.
Darkling: Sup?
Mal: Well that’s… cool. I guess. Alina? Alina? Hello?
Darkling: Alina, I-I think I love you. With your powers, together we can save Ravka and rule as one.
Alina: Oh, Darkling! I love you t- wait, your eyes look a little dodgy…
Mal: Alina! The Darkling is evil! We have to escape and find a mystical Stag so that The Darkling can’t use its powers against you!
Darkling: Ha! Found you. Now your powers are mine and I shall use you as a tool to take over the world! Hahahahahahahahahaha!
Alina: Gee, wonder what I’m going to do? Oh, I know! Time to open up a can of whoop-ass, fuckface!
Darkling: Got damnit!
The End
jazchau
HAHA this “Mal: Well that’s… cool. I guess. Alina? Alina? Hello?” Me: IN YOUR FACE MAL.
I also love that pic you used, adorbs to the max I think it’s a crime.
BookaddictBieke
Haha xD Great book though.
MaijaSteinbrika
Again, frickin’ hilarious, even having not read the book it’s still funny.
Though I’m not sure if there are any spoilers or not. I want to read it desperately nonetheless.
LucyTheReader
I haven’t read this yet but I REALLY want to so seeing this will probably make me finally pick it up now. Thanks for sharing! 🙂
Megan
I love your ‘In 10 Lines’ reviews so much! They crack me up. 🙂
Kate C.
ahahahahaha Love Alina’s last line! Honestly, this feature is so kick ass. Love it.
Bookie565
Lol
scottreadsit
This is perfect!
scottreadsit
This is perfect!
Neyra
Niiiice. I’m reading this soon!! :p Great post Kat.
The Hipster Owl's Bookshelf
Uh…yeah…maybe skip the book? lol
Steph Sinclair
No! It’s a great book! Kat and I love this series. 🙂
In Ten Lines is a satire feature of books we like and dislike.
Steph Sinclair
No! It’s a great book! Kat and I love this series. 🙂
In Ten Lines is a satire feature of books we like and dislike.
BookaddictBieke
The Hipster Owl’s Bookshelf No! You should read it! It’s an awesome book!
samee
Even though I read Shadow & Bone last year, the 10 lines for this book are just too hilarious and awesome to pass up 🙂
samee
Even though I read Shadow & Bone last year, the 10 lines for this book are just too hilarious and awesome to pass up 🙂
Princess__Ash
I love you forever and it’s no wonder why I’m retweeting your posts half the time… Okay, most of the time. ALL RIGHT ALL OF THE TIME.
arcatmull
I just recently finished up Shadow and Bone, and your ten line summary was perfect! Your lines are hilarious, yet sum up a (somewhat) serious book perfectly.
arcatmull
I just recently finished up Shadow and Bone, and your ten line summary was perfect! Your lines are hilarious, yet sum up a (somewhat) serious book perfectly.
Lisa FicTalk
Best. In 10 Lines. EVER.
Especially the last line… Darkling: Got Damnit!
LOL