Review: ReVamped by Ada Adams

31 July, 2013 Reviews 51 comments

Sometimes I see a book tweeted about, or mentioned somewhere, and on the spur of the moment I’ll buy it.  Randomly, I’ll neglect my careful pile of TBR ARCs that I’m supposed to be reading, deviate from my schedule and try something completely left wing.  Sometimes this turns out really great.  Sometimes it doesn’t.

This was one of those times where it doesn’t.  Ever been in a dream that you kind of liked, though couldn’t help but notice that it made absolutely no sense?  If you don’t, ReVamped is a great way to experience the sensation for yourself.  A young, president’s daughter is off on her first assignment!  To unite a ragtag group of weirdo vamps and turn them into a team!  For reasons…

Unfortunately, things go awry when mysterious forces work to attempt to kidnap her!  For reasons…

Luckily, there is a super hot guy who is mysterious, sexy, there to protect her and somehow knows something about her!  For reasons…

ReVamped was kind of like if you took The Vampire Diaries and Mighty Ducks and created some kind of weird baby.

Mighty-Ducks

There has got to be a fanfic of this somewhere…

It had the same kind of small-world,plot twists where everyone is related/knows each other somehow.  Drama!  So much drama!  And the ragtag group was, on one hand, extremely formulaic and, on the other, probably the best thing about this novel.  They were funny, interesting characters – eventually.  Unfortunately, getting them there required the smoothest road of annoying blandness I’ve ever come across.

Indeed, the beginning and ending of this story are its weakest links.  The very beginning because the author hasn’t finessed the balance of info dumping and narrative commencement.  Thus the beginning was like an alarmingly boring series on infomercials where I was left wondering if I could just skip it or flip to another channel.

“How’s it going, Dad?” I asked.

*Insert two paragraph explanation on protagonist’s relationship to father.

“Swell, daughter, I’m off to see the president tomorrow!”

*Insert three paragraph explanation on how her father is the president of vampires and how that came about.

“Oh, wonderful!  Hey can I totes head out of here on a mission?  I’m heaps bored.”

*Insert two paragraphs of the protagonist wallowing over her caged childhood and giving her entire back story.

“Sure.”

*Insert characters extreme excitement and mental checklist of everything she’s going to do*

It was so clunky and awkward that I found myself cringing, this was proceeded by the most inane, colourless writing, though that did improve.  It read a lot like a child’s fanfiction, which was interesting as the writing did pick up a good deal more later in the story.

The romance with the lead character was absolutely bland.  It seemed there was more focus on making him as mysterious and surly as possible to shoehorn him into a popular archetype than to actually develop him as a character, or the relationship in any meaningful way.  I felt like I slipped on a banana and they were in love.

Throw in some fiendish, mustache-twirling villains, a completely ridiculous ending which stretched even my ability to suspend my disbelief and you end up with ReVamped.  Something that seemed to realize how campy and silly it was, but ultimately, never managed to pack in the fun, vitality and necessary introspection to really pull off the effect.

Over all, I cautiously advise reading the free sample before purchasing this one!

51 Responses to “Review: ReVamped by Ada Adams”

  1. Ambrluvsports

    “I felt like I slipped on a banana and they were in love.”
    LOL. I wish I could steal this line.
    Great review. I like the formula breakdown – it was like a morph of In 10 Lines

  2. ABookishHeart

    Wait, the Vampire Diaries and the Mighty Ducks?  Are you sure you didn’t love this one?!
    The info-dumping definitely sounds cringe-worthy and awkward.  Yikes.  
    I don’t see myself reading this one.  For reasons…

  3. Fangs4Fantasy

    “I’ll neglect my careful pile of TBR ARCs that I’m supposed to be reading”
    Bad Kat! Bad Kat! Shame! SHAAAAAAAAAAAME (I totally do the same thing)
    And if there’s one thing I LOATHE in a book (and there’s so many more than one thing) it’s things happening for unspecified REASONS! I just have a mental image of the author with a big hammer, a square peg and a round hole desperately forcing their characters through a plot that JUST DOES NOT FIT!
    Random infodumping of irrelevant trivia that has no role in the story and involves characters literally monologuing their lives to themselves is a close second
    And in third is not providing a free drink. Books should start doing that.

  4. Interstellar film entier

    Find all the newest new and Movie Reviews at Movie Vault.
    As with all love affairs, there were some bumps in the
    road. Ajay’s performance was appreciated in both the movies.

  5. Girne

    What’s up everybody, here every one is sharing these kinds of familiarity, so it’s pleasant
    to read this blog, and I used to pay a visit this webpage all the time.

  6. Jan-Pro School Cleaning Company Indianapolis

    Commercial cleaning services ensure more than just cleaning restrooms and waxing floors.

    This decision to hire professional cleaners is
    one of the best ones a company can make. The beauty of having this business is that you can introduce
    new services, which are connected to your primary services.

  16. Emagrece mesmo

    Excellent article. Everything here is just top notch,The information is absolutely amazing.
    Perhaps you can write next articles
    relating to this article. I want to read even more things about it!

  21. Comprar

    Yoou have touched some pleasant things here. Any way
    keep upp wrinting

    I would like to thank you for the efforts you have made in writing this article.
    I am hoping the same best work from you in the future as well

  22. Preço

    Yoou have touched some pleasant things here. Any way
    keep upp wrinting

    I would like to thank you for the efforts you have made in writing this article.
    I am hoping the same best work from you in the future as well

  24. Ana Alice

    I would like to thank you for the efforts you have put in writing this site.
    I am hoping to view the same high-grade content from you later on as
    well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my own, personal site now

  26. saiba mais aqui

    I love vampire stories, I’ve always been in love with them since I was a kid, this e-book is very good, I’ve read it and recommend it to anyone who has not yet read it.

  29. orçamento de piscina

    here.

    I would like to thank you for the efforts you have put in writing this site.
    I am hoping to view the same high-grade content from you later on as
    well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my own, personal site now

  49. Felipe

    Nice article. Everything here is just top notch,The information is absolutely amazing.