Dear Debby Advice for Fictional YA Characters (5)

29 September, 2012 Dear Debby 9 comments

Dear Debby

Dear Debby is Cuddlebuggery’s weekly advice col­umn for Fic­tional, Young Adult char­ac­ters to get some life or romance advice. Debby is a car­ing, nur­tur­ing soul giv­ing down to earth, wise words of wis­dom to those in need. To email Dear Debby about your fic­tional trou­bles and lit­er­ary char­ac­ters, please email contactus@cuddlebuggery.com.

Dear Debby,

I am a fallen angel who was kicked out of heaven a long time ago for falling in love with a human.  Now I have the opportunity to get back to heaven if I kill this teenage human girl.  The problem is that I met her and whilst I keep trying to kill her, I just can’t seem to bring myself to do it.  Now I’m not sure I can or that I want to anymore but I’m really conflicted about this.  It should be as easy as snapping her neck, but I just can’t do it!  I think I’m in love with her, but if I don’t slaughter her like carrion then I can’t ever get into heaven and that would really suck.  Until then I just keep stalking and harassing her which is kind of getting old.  Please tell me what to do.

-Murder patch

Dear Murder patch,

Generally, in these kinds of situations, I would advise that relationships require trust and commitment and have no place for lies.   But in this situation I would suggest that you explain the truth of the circumstances to this girl before maintaining a respectful distance of one mile radius at all times for her personal safety.  After all, let’s be honest here.  If you have to wonder whether you love a girl enough to not kill her – then maybe you’re not in the right place to be in a relationship.  Or around people.  Or free to walk the streets amongst human beings.  Also, I can’t stress enough how valuable quality psychiatric care is.

All the best,

Debby

 

9 Responses to “Dear Debby Advice for Fictional YA Characters (5)”

    • KatKennedy

       @Senator Good to know you’re not in love with a murderous stalking angel!

  2. Kara_M

    Clearly this angel (whoever they are 😉 ) is psychotic and deranged. Too bad we can’t just teach him to “be nice.”

  4. Krystal Henderson

    I have a feeling I know who this is and, seriously, this is an actual love interest? It boggles the mind!

  6. Sarah saz101

    I think my advice is to go for it. The world would be a better place without the girl dumb enough to hang around this guy repeatedly when she already THINKS he might be out to kill her.
     
    Also, I’ve seen DOGMA. I’m not sure his plan will work out as well as he plans.