So I stopped and thought to myself, what am I sick of reading right now? I came up with about six different ideas. But that’s a lot of work, yo. Instead I wrote three of them. These are generalised. I am in no way referring to any one book or trying to call any authors out. I kind of just went with my gut and let the bile pour out. Which, technically speaking, is far more likely to happen than any kind of justified intuition. Guts aren’t very good for making rational decisions. Just saying. So sit back and enjoy these three books I am currently sick of reading, reading about, hearing about, thinking about, maybe dreamed and don’t even exist.
Images belong to: Futuresnowno1, Nelieke
1. Unlimited by Randy McRanderson
A book of emotions so epic that it gets a generic, one word title. The Retold story of a girl suffering through the trial of having to pick between two really hot guys. How will Emerald DeAmericana possibly survive her heartrending tale of forbidden love, and even more forbidden love with two completely different boys. How will this one choice define her as a character in ways that we don’t generally define males in literature. Read this book, and be bored out of your mind by the melodrama! Experience the love, the loss, but mostly a lot of illicit smooches.
Image belongs to: MarcoRibbe-de
2. No Looking Back by Genius ReWritingski
One girl. One apocalypse. One story we’ve read at least five times based on the one time it was a pretty good book. With a title that reminds you that you’re a privileged shithead who doesn’t appreciate what you’ve got until its gone, just like the protagonist, Esmerelda Survivalpants. Don’t miss out on the chance to read a boring book that’s supposed to feature an apocalypse but instead focuses almost entirely on the love story. There will probably be two. Take a journey that could be told in one novel then drag it out into three. Esmerelda Survivalpants was just your average girl until an apocalypse brought her and Boringface Ficklefer together. Surviving the wilderness is okay because nothing really happens, but can they survive each other?! (Spoiler: yes, but you won’t.) Explore new worlds all based on a reimagining of Mad Max because it seems we’re all out of ideas. Embrace a love that can only be tamed by wilderness and poor hygiene and was never that compelling to begin with if we stop and be honest with ourselves.
Image belongs to: YuuGray
3. Snow White: The Again-aning by Career Revivalstein
From an acclaimed children’s author who usually has great ideas, revisit the popular children’s tale that’s so rapey, people trip over themselves to retell it. Romance is in the air when Dead Girl tropes meet Girl in Freezer trope meets even more chances to capitalise on childhood nostalgia. Count how many ways the same story can be upcycled and merged with tired old elements in an attempt to create something people will consider reading. There is no stopping this love. Because she’s asleep. She can’t. Gloss over the disturbing elements of that narrative for yourself in Snow White: The Again-aning.
So funny, again! Where do you get yoyr ideas, Kat?! Haha I agree, especially with number 3!
Goldie recently posted…Review: Welcome to Rosie Hopkins’ Sweet Shop of Dreams [Rosie Hopkins’ Sweet Shop, book 1]
From the soul of my violently murdered mentor who I SHALL AVENGE!
Bieke @ Istyria book blog
Bieke @ Istyria book blog recently posted…Bookish Babble: Genres I tend to avoid!
I do love re-tellings, but only when the author gave really unique spins on the story. I loved Cruel Beauty because the take was so original.
Missie @ A Flurry of Ponderings
Missie recently posted…Many Sides of Medusa Blog Hop
I have liked them in the past, I’m just sick of them coming along, being all annoying with their constant stream of retelling.
This was so awesome….I sense a feature in your future!
Naaaahhh! I don’t have enough ideas for a feature. I’m boring like that.
Amen to all three (especially 1).
Kaniesha @ Deux Lectrices
I don’t even mess with #1 books anymore, I stopped reading them when I got about 50 pages into Fallen(?) I can’t remember the title but it was hella boring.
LOL’d at “but can they survive each other?!”
I don’t come across too many retellings though so I’m out of the loop for #3.
Yeah, I don’t read them too often now, only when it can’t be avoided.
I’m surprised that you only came up with 6!!! The first one is so true for me right now. (Won’t say which book I’m struggling through, but it’s in my currently reading if you’re curious).
You NEED to do one of these for the fantasy/pnr girl that is all-powerful. Like now.
BTW- Those covers are freaking brilliant. As usual. 🙂
Kate Copeseeley recently posted…George, Mary Sues, and Epic Fantasy
Ha! Thanks, Kate. I might do the others, depends how motivated I get. Those covers took work, yo!
Fangs 4 the Fantasy (@Fangs4Fantasy)
Depressingly, I agree with every word – love triangles! MELODRAMA, BILLOWY DRESSES!
And the world has ended? BUT ARE THE BOYS HOT? ARE THEY? THIS IS WHAT IS IMPORTANT!
And reimagined fairy tales are great – but why why why why is it ALWAYS Snow White? 8 bazillion fairy tales out there and it is ALWAYS SNOW WHITE
Fangs 4 the Fantasy (@Fangs4Fantasy) recently posted…The Vampire Diaries, Season 5, Episode 16: While You Were Sleeping
I agree. Snow White again and again and again. I have to put it down to the inherent rapeyness of it.
The again-aning, haha. It’s true though.
HOW DARE YOU INSULT BORINGFACE FICKLEFER?
HE IS HOT.
and when the world is ending, that is ALL that matters. Who cares about surviving when you get to shack up with a hot dude?
Choosing between two guys is the most hardest thing in the world and leading them on is the way to go.
Rashika recently posted…Side Effects May Vary by Julie Murphy
It’s true. Having to choose between two hot, devoted guys is a painful, agonising experience that must be recorded again and again.
Nope. I have NO idea what you’re writing about. No. Idea. At. All.
But I lie a lot! 😉
Loved this. And THAT is tre truth.
Glad you liked it!
Very nice! This had me giggling like crazy.
johannah recently posted…Green paint
In #2, don’t forget the girl’s obsession over whether or not she’s actually pretty enough to live, let alone to win a guy’s second glance (such as Pure or Birthmarked). Or how she’ll stop in the middle of a fight, finding much needed supplies, etc to hyperventilate about his beautiful face, abs or shoulders. Because when you are literally on the losing edge of survival, beauty is what it’s really about.
Yes! Let’s obsess about looks when the world is ending! That’s kind of why How I Live Now was good – because she started to ignore her compulsive self esteem issues.
Amanda @ Book Badger
I could not agree with more with these Kat! I’m getting sick of them too, great post 🙂
Amanda @ Book Badger recently posted…Review – Me Since You
Bahahahah ahhhh, thanks for the laugh! Ever since reading Fallen by Lauren Kate I don’t touch books with a girls on the cover clad in a billowing dress. They have been deemed officially untrustworthy!
Lindsey recently posted…7 Must Haves For Your Fictional Male Love Interest
Being someone who really likes fairy tales and retellings, I don’t mind number 3 that much 😉 But the first one, ugh. I’m getting tired of the same old stories with 2 hot guys, 1 girl and a story that could have been amazing if it wasn’t about the romance all the time.
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Eileen @ Singing and Reading in the Rain
Hahahahahaha omg I love these!! And I so agree, like you have such a huge opportunity to capitalize on a great, creative idea, but then no, you start focusing mainly on the romance and everything goes to shit. It’s such a downer! And that last one was perfect, the amount of retelling books that have popped up recently (and also the amount of movies with Snow White and the Huntsman, Mirror Mirror, etc.) have made me almost hate the entire kind of thing. Fantastic post! <33
Eileen @ Singing and Reading in the Rain recently posted…Life of a Blogger (8): Traveling
I think this summarizes are why I am seeing so many articles pop up lately along the lines of is “YA dying?” Well, no its not. But I do like to think that it is slowly weeding itself out of all the cookie cutter books.
Cait @ Notebook Sisters
BAHAHAHA! This is SO brilliant!! Me too, by the way, me too…I particularly like the author names, though. Genius ReWritingski might be my favourite.
Cait @ Notebook Sisters recently posted…Things you DIDN’T know about the Notebook Sisters
Lol, these are absolutely spot on!! And I’m SO sick of seeing these kind of books but they are everywhere. Especially #3.
Cayce recently posted…[LGBT Month] 10 days and counting!
I read it this morning, but now, after I have stopped laughing, I have to say that this speaks to the hearts of all of the readers. While I laughed, I also nodded and felt a certain irritation growing when I read this, because it is so true. Wonderful post, Kat!
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Joy @ Thoughts By J
HA! So brilliantly spot on Kat. Yes, let’s forget about survival altogether and just pine over the first boy you meet. Who cares if he’s a serial killer just escaped from prison, he’s hot!
Joy @ Thoughts By J recently posted…Book Review: Disruption (Disruption #1) by Jessica Shirvington
Theres are so wonderful and hilarious! Number 1 is definitely my favourite there are so many books exactly like that everywhere now. I hate the dresses the most I like. Who casually wears a ball gown! Thanks for the great post.
Katie McCue recently posted…TBR Pile Up #1
LOL! I couldn’t agree with you more. Authors just don’t have always have original ideas.
“The Again-aning.” That’s just instant classic stuff there. 😀
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I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of good retellings, but I do wish they would retell the other stories. And I’m definitely in awe of your Photoshopping. I hate transferring parts of an image, mostly because I always get it wrong. You got SKILLZ, Kat.
Shannelle C. recently posted…Fangirling Friday: The Big Bang Theory
I will be using the ‘againaning’ in regular speech from now on 😀
*applauds while laughing*
Alyssa Shrout recently posted…The Advance
Excuse me… dying. *falls over*
Vickie Ramage recently posted…Discussion: Can You Keep Up With Sequels?
Dude. This is awesome and PAINFULLY true!
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For a second I thought these were real books because it’s a Monday and I was all RAGEEEE.
But the funny thing is…these are real books, and far too often. Oh well.
Kat, you’re fabulous. JSYK
Natalie recently posted…The Wolf’s Cry Book Tour – Final Day
Brilliant. Just brilliant. I’m rather sick of all these books myself.
But this post. . . If I wasn’t so tired, I’d be laughing. Genius. Absolutely, positively genius.
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Elisa (Just a Hunch Book Blog)
Shame– I’m actually a huge fan of Randy McRanderson.
Elisa (Just a Hunch Book Blog) recently posted…Review of What the Moon Said
Christina (A Reader of Fictions)
Oh Kat, I am sadly with you on much of this, though, admittedly, I will take ALL of the fairy tale retellings that you have.
But, yeah, as much as I love, and even kind of need, romance in my books, so often the detractor in what I’m reading is the romance. I just want to shake the authors, like “guys, this is my favorite part, and you ruined it.” And then sob in a corner with my vodka.
Your second cover also reminds me that I’m kind of tired of Steampunk, at least the ones with covers like that. There tends to be not enough cover development for me.
Christina (A Reader of Fictions) recently posted…Blog Tour Review: The Enchanted by Rene Denfeld
You are brilliant. Truly, I hope never to read another love triangle ever again.
The first one had me laughing sooo hard! I hate love triangles so much that I run screaming every time I come across one. If there’s just the slightest hint at one in the blurb, the book’s back on the shelf in no time at all.
I’m also totally with you on the second one. I’m not into dystopias because they tend to be mostly all about the love story and in most cases have a happy ending. I mean, dystopias are supposed to have hopeless and bleak endings! That’s why it’s called dystopia.
Except for the Lunar Chronicles, I haven’t read any fairytale retellings so far, so I can still enjoy them.
Ellie recently posted…I Got Tagged #3: My Favourite Literary Couples
I don’t know if it’s the content I’d be tired of or the what. I’m also not sure whether those covers are real… but what I’m tired of is receiving Indies and getting low-budget book covers.. they either have over-Photoshopped people on them which doesn’t work well with the background, or really kiddish covers (seriously, it looks like something a 5 years-old would draw!)
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Black 'n Write
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Weekly Recap| Mar 23-29, 2014 | Oh, the Books!
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HA HA HA omigosh hilarious!!! I totally fell you though! SOOOO relatable!!! 😀 Thanks so much for sharing, and wow what a great idea! (Also I love the cover designs there!)
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