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Blogging is a lot of work. It’s a simply fact I’m sure we all can moderately agree on. All the time put into formatting, scheduling, promoting, writing, reading can be a little exhausting. As such, it’s not completely unreasonable for us here at Cuddlebuggery to ask authors who wish us to review their book to give a little something in return. Sure, you might be feel that your time is better spent, I don’t know, writing, but it’s literally the least you can do.  If you are an author and had no idea these Author Commandments existed, then rest assured all will be forgiven if you complete these steps within 48 hours. Real life be damned.

1. Buy me chocolate.

2. Jump up and down while patting your stomach and rubbing your head. Or is it patting your head and rubbing your stomach? Oh well, AMUSE ME.

3. Fart the alphabet.

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I was looking for inspiration for this post. A friend DM’d me and gave me two ideas:

“I would LOVE a post on the people who react to drama by saying that authors are people too and bloggers are mean.”

Her other suggestion was:

“OR a post on yaoi. Because reasons. Sexy reasons.”

Both of these ideas have great merit, and each one would make good post material. But here at Cuddlebuggery, we’re not only interested in good posts. Or fine posts. We want to blow your mind. So I’ve decided to take these two ideas and join them into one amazing post – adding in the Yuri for my own fun. This post is Not Safe For Work, and is all the better for being so.

So reviews get written by people on Goodreads, or bloggers on their blogs. Authors come along and read them and cat fights happen. Then other bloggers or random bystanders will be like:

“Well, authors are people too.”

That’s right.

20th Century Ghosts

If there is but one thing that I truly adore about Stephen King’s work, it is his penchant for crafting consistently interesting short stories. Granted, the quality of his storytelling tends to vary quite broadly from one tableau to the next, and his tone can vary so dramatically that it is oftentimes difficult to maintain a stable understanding and mindset towards what he is trying to accomplish in the space of some dozen pages at a time. Still, his entries are always, if nothing else, entertaining, with at least one wonderfully weird, wonderfully unsettling idea or detail to make the brief journey in one way or another worthwhile.

I bring this up because Joe Hill strikes me as being much the same sort of writer as his father. In fact, I could easily see 20th Century Ghosts as being a work stemmed from the elder King’s pen, so similar is Hill’s wordplay and imagination.

Fortune's Pawn by Rachel Bach

I was looking at my Goodreads stats a little while ago and noticed that I tend to swing high on ratings. This worries me, I don’t want my five stars to become meaningless. I decided to reserve five star ratings for books that make me want to punch things they’re so fantastic. It was to be the dawn of a new day of responsible, thoughtful ratings where a full five is rare.

Then, of course, I read Fortune’s Pawn.

Wall-punchingly amazing? Check.
Totally shippable, swoonworthy ship? Check.
Exciting, action packed plot with an intriguing mystery to be unraveled? Check.

Basically, Fortune’s Pawn deserves those five stars and then some. So, new plan, we’re going to institute a codeword system. From here on out I will continue to like things with the full breadth of my enthusiasm (I’m not sorry, while ranting can be fun, I generally enjoy liking things more) and will let you know when a book is the best of the best of the best (ala Newsflesh or Lumatere) with a TBD codeword.

Twilight Threesomes

Ever read a book with a really great love triangle, and you think to yourself – C’mon guys! Just all make out and this drama would be over already.

The two love interests are up in each other’s faces, each fighting passionately over the protagonist. Things get heated. Tempers flare. Then you remember how quickly hate turns to love. Tempers to passion. Then you start hissing, “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

They’re nose to nose, huffing hot breaths of air, their chests heaving with anger. “Kiss! C’mon! Just kiss already!”

But they never do, and deep inside, you know they totally should. All of them should kiss. Then all of them can walk hand-in-hand into the sunset happily ever after. If you know what I mean, then come read some of my biggest offenders.

Clockwork Angel

I think we all know that I did not like this novel in any significant way. However, I can’t be the only one wondering why there needed to be a love triangle.

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